If there’s one thing I realised

it’s that after spending 5 hours a day on WordPress for work, I am incredibly lazy to come over to my personal blog and write about my day. Been relying heavily on Dayre to track my life which isn’t a good thing! This blog has been with me since Sec 3 (oh my) and despite beingΒ incrediblyΒ cringy at times, it’s good to look back on occasionally. But unfortunately it’s so difficult to add photos, ensure they’re aligned etc etc :-( I’m a lazy person but OK – I’ll start getting my thoughts in order haha. It’s been more than a month since the semester ended and I have yet to collect my thoughts + do a module review (though am admittedly very lazy to do one).

Not to mention I often leave my laptop in office instead of bringing it home because there are so many other things to do at home!! Everyone at work is very baffled at how I do it but it’s just about preferring to read and do other things instead of watching shows, which I don’t do much of anyway.

It’s the 6th week into my internship – I am halfway there! – and it’s been a learning journey. Will dedicate a solo post to this post-internship because erm I don’t want my current boss to somehow, due to his incredible vast SEO capabilities, find what I write about the company LOL. Not that it’s bad la it’s just ~uncomfortable~ haha.


Also doing module planning + internship planning and I am o v e r w h e l m e d like HELP LA what is even going on?? At least I’ve settled on my FYP so that’s one direction I can work towards module-wise but for PA I’m undecided between Journ and PR :-( Still unsure of which I want to pursue as a career LOL the future is real and daunting!!!! But I know I don’t really want to work somewhere which requires you to wear penguin suits to work haha or doll up super well because I amΒ lazy and most defnitely not that kind of girl.

Can’t believe I’ll be graduating in 2 year’s time :’-) / :’-(

Zan x

 

Work

has pretty much swamped me thus far it’s a continuous cycle of a respite for a 2 days followed by an intense 3 days. Quite possibly because all our weekly deadlines are on Friday so we don’t feel the rush till Wednesday haha. But come June it’s really going to be quite deadline-heavy with all the new editorial series we’re pushing out + the campaign plans etc. Wew – am not ready!!!!!

The thing about working in a startup is the incredibly huge control you have over things that happen in the company. There’s pretty much nobody caring about you and if you pitch an idea that gets approved, you’re going to have to take ownership of it. There’s nobody you can hide behind and you have to report directly to the boss (cri). I’m learning a lot here though. Or at least, I’d like to think that I am. I’ve never been pushed quite so hard before but I have to say I’m enjoying myself for the most part! Writing down a daily timetable/to-do list also helps a lot in managing the panic that rises up in me every time I realise I have something new to add to my to-do list :’-) Have yet to find out how to manage my anxiety when it comes to tasks I have to complete for the day lol the most therapeutic way thus far is for me to jot down a very detailed timeline of where I’ll be/what I’ll do at a particular time, but then it also means I gets stressed out when things don’t go according to plan. Ugh is there really no way to solve this stress-panic problem!?

Just wanted to record some emotions here it’s been a long day and I’m tired :-(

Zan x

It is finally

the last day of Y2S2 :’-)

Been pretty much a heck of a rollercoaster (also a loooooooong wait of watching everyone else finish their finals before me) (why Hedwig why).

Things that have gone through my mind thus far

Me, at the start of the semester: Oh I’m going to save my GPA this sem! And be really on task with readings!

Me, at work: Hee hee this is fun! Also chill :~)

Me, when people ask if they can work at my workplace too: STOP KS-ING MY JOB lol jk sure welcome to da fam!! (There’s gonna be a heck lot of WKW students at SAC next sem man)

Me, getting back my Poetry grades for Creative Writing: Not surprised LOL (but can’t S/U because see below) (Did get an A- for the multimedia project so that’s gonna save my tragic C thank you Jesus amen)

Me, doing PR Writing project: Wah what’s this media monitoring am I sure I really want to do PR next time ARE YOU SURE ZAN

Me, doing Copywriting: well am defo not doing advertising NOPE-ING MY WAY OUT OF HERE

Me, the day of my French 2 final: LMAO SUA LA S/U LA (failed the final because was working on copywriting project and didn’t study LOL I MAKE GOOD DECISIONS)

Me, looking at my deadlines: Oh nevermind every submission is on the same week let me just give up on getting 2nd lower this sem there’s still 1.5 more years.

Me, with a Hedwig final at 2:30pm: LET ME BLOG

The no finals life is really insane frick especially when I had a long stretch of free time (about 2 weeks) and everything was due in Week 12 and 13. It was terrible because I do not know how to manage my time well and spent that 2 free weeks slacking and meeting up with friends instead of starting on prep for my deadlines :~)

LOL but sem 2 was fun la. I did a LOT of writing (copywriting creative writing newswriting pr writing) which I love – except copwriting zan out I had fab groupmates but the mod is not for me – and made me narrow down what I want to do in future… maybe. I am known for being flaky look at me coming in all rah-rah about Ad/PR and now I have conveniently replaced Ad with Journ.

To be honest still want to start my own magazine and publish a short novel la but how to earn money from that?? How?? #questionstothinkabout #adulting

Internship starts next week and I am excited and terrified I hope it will be fun! Googled a lot about the company and what previous interns have said about working there I’m trash HAHAHA I will be fine God gave me this internship – as opposed to for another company – for good reason :~)

Zan x

the future

You might be expecting a serious piece on what the future has in store blah blah but I am not that kind of person so here is a list of things that I am worried about in the near and far future!!!!

  • will I be able to cope with my school workload + tuition + part time job? realised the workload really quite no joke – very stoked to push myself but at the same time worried that not only will I fall short of the professor’s standards but also my own.
  • what am I going to do for fyp? I’m definitely going for either campaign or feature writing but am still unsure!! Pretty much set my heart on doing a pr internship though (but with my track record I probably won’t get it de zzz I never get anything I want when it comes to applying for things sob) (but OK I have faith that I will still grow wherever God places me like the other modules I have this semester hee)
  • groupmates for fyp πŸ˜ͺ self-explanatory I believe.
  • ok my JOB. Very important ya my ι₯­η’— – how am I going to repay student loans, save up for all the adulting expenses et cetera.
  • speaking of savings mine are dangerously low and 2017 is the year I turn it all around!!! Set a savings goal and a budget sheet for every month and hopefully I will achieve that target.

Sigh. Typing this out has made me feel better though. It’s only day two of sem two haha goodness.

Zan x

$$$

OK la I’ve been frivolously spending for the past year and a half – it’s time to buckle down and save before spending instead of spending and half-heartedly trying to save afterwards!!!!

Examples of spending before saving
– Little Mix concert
– Simple Plan concert + VIP pass
– DnD
– Paparazzi
The total cost of all these is probably around $500?? Which is about a month’s income ;-; This habit really has to go I should start saving more :'(

I know it’s not impossible because I have seen people do it so – ME TOO huehue. Probably time to pack meals to school aka have more discipline and wake up slightly earlier to cook! Or even just a salad from home would suffice YUM COLD PASTA 👻

Also deep down I’m guilty because I’m only even thinking about this because one tutee quit on me & now I’m left with two – if I still had three tutees I would continue my jolly way 😅 (but I still want to find another tutee tuition loans are not going to pay themselves)

Enough nonsense about my bad spending habits ok bb midterms were over and I am very excited to read HP and the Cursed Child + binge watch Brooklyn 99!!!!

Zan x

280816 bon voyage

image

So excited for her!!! Waiting for you to regale us with tales about Germany 🌼

Jett and I are such spendthrifts. We met at 8+ for dinner at the airport and couldn’t decide what to have for dinner because we were spoilt for choice. Ended up eating Aoy’s Thai because it was the most “economical” option out of the places we wanted to eat at – ended up spending only 12$/pax for an appetiser, drink, main meal and dessert!!! 10/10 deal. The both of us were really full after our dinner but decided to get milk and honey after sending Zuning off since there is always room for more dessert :’) Rushed over to T1 after dinner at T3 to hang with ning for a grand total of 10 mins before she had to enter the departure hall!!!! Lmao not sure if we went to the airport to send her off or for dinner 🌚 Side note Jett and I “pfft-ed” her when she said she was coming back again in December OK RLY THEN WE GO FOR WHAT jk xxΒ  Milk & honey was pretty nice but I think it was too frozen for my liking – out of all the froyos available I still like sogurt’s the best πŸ˜† (And KFC’s simply because it’s 2$ and how can you say no to 2$) Dawdled around while eating dessert part ii and when we reached the MRT station we realised it was the last train to joo koon……..omg thankful!!!!!!! Was panicking about whether there would be a train from JE LOL and halfway through our train ride I looked up and saw a guy who looked like J’s brother HAHAHAHAHAH showed Jett a picture of him & he said “ya the resemblance is really strong” well I guess it was him – he subtly shifted his body to face away from us once he noticed us I think πŸ˜…

It’s my last day of work at the library today! Excited because it means more time for myself and my studies!! Lagging so far behind that I actually feel semi-guilty about taking a break now that’s how bad it is :< but hopefully it means I have less stress I haven’t been sleeping well AT ALL I keep waking up earlier than I’m supposed to (without an alarm) and rushing around thinking I’m late only to realise I’m not…..hais. Can’t wait to get proper sleep after this is over!!!!! Plus read Cursed Child I want to read it at one go instead of in bits and pieces and I will only get this luxury of time after DND πŸ˜ͺ Also on my to-do list is packing my table it’s a huge mess and I think I’ll donate some books to the library corner!! Am just undecided on which ones to give because I really love them all but I really lack space at home :-(

Kind of feel like catching up with old friends.

Alright upcoming French test au revoir!!!!!

Zan x

the tides rise and fall, the waves come and go

EKKLESIA DAY 1
Was in charge of camp registration at Tembusu and it was mostly smooth-sailing! Didn’t have many cock ups or bottlenecks but I’ve realised that I really pride ~conveyor belt efficiency~ over anything else… Like I rather do things by myself and be super efficient and accurate if a little slower than have a lot of helpers who knock hands with one another as they scramble to find card keys and indemnity forms. Strong personal preference though and I’m still grateful to the volunteers who came down early to serve as well! TGF them :’) Am not a team person in general because I am a huge perfectionist when it comes to things I have to submit/tasks I’m assigned to complete.

My teammates are super willing to serve and it made my first time joining the camp subcommittee a really good one.. they don’t hesitate to jump in headfirst and solve whatever problem we’re facing at the moment and it’s really heartwarming to see that! Am very very happy and blessed to be working with such wonderful people my heart really pours out love and gratitude.

Left around 2:30 and headed for tuition which ended 40 minutes after it was supposed to because I stayed back to play a game with my tutee. I promised to play a board game with him if he managed to get his homework done and promises must never be broken (ESP WITH KIDS) I want kids of my own too *sighs* Went popular to source for some assessment books for another tutee (maybe I should start giving them nicknames so it gets easier to blog about them than tutee A /B/C – ya I have three which… actually maybe isn’t a lot but it feels like a lot to me with the amount of time I sacrifice for other things) and I realised that Popular doesn’t stock many assessment books for Normal Technical students which is quite sad.. because it means that publishers don’t write assessment books for NT students – it’s like they’re assuming NT kids won’t study and won’t bother trying to do well? What an unfair thought. The selection is much lesser than the Express one with parents being able to cherry pick their preferred publisher and all. There are zero science assessment books at all with the exception of TYS – what????Β (This also makes my job harder do I just teach from the school textbook or WHAT) I enjoy this challenge given to me though and my goal is to hopefully help my tutee score >60 for her final year exams. For reference she’s currently scoring about 40+ to 50+ and I just started teaching her last week. We’ll see how this goes.

Feeling a litle hollower than usual today; I hope this feeling passes.It bites at me and I feel small.

Zan x

Talked to my mum earlier about the pros and cons of continuing to work at Hollandse in July and I doubt I’ll be working there in spite of Jhet’s offer :\ The money was tempting though because if I were to continue working there I could work 5 days a week (all morning shifts since tuition is in the afternoon/evening) + my salary would be higher than it was in June. But it would also mean that I spend less time doing things for myself and with the people I love. June has been really shitty in terms of time spent with friends and I barely got to meet anyone unless it was like at 10am in the morning LOL.

Since I can survive very comfortably on tuition pay from next month then I’ll stop working! (I sound like I’m trying to convince myself LOL) Anyway was looking at my planner and I realised that I haven’t completed some things on my summer break list – namely get fit hahahahahhahahahaha and a few other things that I won’t be sharing here. So maybe I should work on that in July HAHAHAHHAHA

OK it’s time for work bb

Zan x

Some life updates instead of general whinging

Signed the contract with NLB (through a v inefficient agency who shall not be named) today which also means signing away my weekends till 18th September which is also partly into the school term… Not sure if I made the right decision hmm especially if I want to take up one more tutee?????? But I’m just really glad I don’t have to compromise on service :~) I am not very sure when I will be doing readings or having project meetings but I will stress over that when I actually have those I guess!

Also work is getting really fun (another job I have too many jobs jk just one fnb & one with the library & tuition & occasional banqueting) because there are more part timers + I’m getting more comfortable with the people there especially Frederick who is incredibly deadpan but so so entertaining?? Back at SnD there was a colleague called Frederick but their personalities are worlds apart oh my I like this Frederick so much better!!!

Jeremy Andrea Jovin & Beverly are really nice too they make the 6 hours fly by and I’m just really happy I chanced upon this job advertisement and decided to go for it!!!

Also I’m supposed to be at boonlay by 9:45AM tomorrow and hunt for some library back door wish me luck

Zan x

I look forward to work every Tuesday Thursday & Friday because I get to see cute little angmoh kids running around hurhur. The people there are also really friendly which is a huge plus point :~) I will be so sad to leave even though I only work three days a week and for half a day each time but I have already grown very attached to the place *deep sniffs*

Was supposed to wake up to go for a run before breakfast but I scraped the idea & just made pancakes for breakfast today. Haven’t been applying myself in the kitchen lately and I want to try making mac & cheese… maybe for work on Sunday?

Speaking of work! Going to be starting a weekend job at Frontier library (the one at boonlay) on weekends – Sat 10am to 3pm and Sun 3pm to 9pm – and I’m pretty excited even though I can’t use my phone/read books I will be in aircon and helping little kids who run up to me excitedly with their library receipts :’) So glad that somehow my money issues are solving themselves I should be debt free by the end of June praise God!!! Will make sure not to sink into such debt again!!! :< Also means I can start tithing more instead of my weekly 2$ or a handful of coins lmao I feel so sad even though I know it’s the thought that counts.

Have been trying to be on the ball lately for some of my other commitments.. sometimes I struggle but I know that God is always with me He has shown Himself so many times throughout the course of this year :’)

Zan x