If there’s one thing I realised

it’s that after spending 5 hours a day on WordPress for work, I am incredibly lazy to come over to my personal blog and write about my day. Been relying heavily on Dayre to track my life which isn’t a good thing! This blog has been with me since Sec 3 (oh my) and despite being incredibly cringy at times, it’s good to look back on occasionally. But unfortunately it’s so difficult to add photos, ensure they’re aligned etc etc :-( I’m a lazy person but OK – I’ll start getting my thoughts in order haha. It’s been more than a month since the semester ended and I have yet to collect my thoughts + do a module review (though am admittedly very lazy to do one).

Not to mention I often leave my laptop in office instead of bringing it home because there are so many other things to do at home!! Everyone at work is very baffled at how I do it but it’s just about preferring to read and do other things instead of watching shows, which I don’t do much of anyway.

It’s the 6th week into my internship – I am halfway there! – and it’s been a learning journey. Will dedicate a solo post to this post-internship because erm I don’t want my current boss to somehow, due to his incredible vast SEO capabilities, find what I write about the company LOL. Not that it’s bad la it’s just ~uncomfortable~ haha.


Also doing module planning + internship planning and I am o v e r w h e l m e d like HELP LA what is even going on?? At least I’ve settled on my FYP so that’s one direction I can work towards module-wise but for PA I’m undecided between Journ and PR :-( Still unsure of which I want to pursue as a career LOL the future is real and daunting!!!! But I know I don’t really want to work somewhere which requires you to wear penguin suits to work haha or doll up super well because I am lazy and most defnitely not that kind of girl.

Can’t believe I’ll be graduating in 2 year’s time :’-) / :’-(

Zan x

 

It is finally

the last day of Y2S2 :’-)

Been pretty much a heck of a rollercoaster (also a loooooooong wait of watching everyone else finish their finals before me) (why Hedwig why).

Things that have gone through my mind thus far

Me, at the start of the semester: Oh I’m going to save my GPA this sem! And be really on task with readings!

Me, at work: Hee hee this is fun! Also chill :~)

Me, when people ask if they can work at my workplace too: STOP KS-ING MY JOB lol jk sure welcome to da fam!! (There’s gonna be a heck lot of WKW students at SAC next sem man)

Me, getting back my Poetry grades for Creative Writing: Not surprised LOL (but can’t S/U because see below) (Did get an A- for the multimedia project so that’s gonna save my tragic C thank you Jesus amen)

Me, doing PR Writing project: Wah what’s this media monitoring am I sure I really want to do PR next time ARE YOU SURE ZAN

Me, doing Copywriting: well am defo not doing advertising NOPE-ING MY WAY OUT OF HERE

Me, the day of my French 2 final: LMAO SUA LA S/U LA (failed the final because was working on copywriting project and didn’t study LOL I MAKE GOOD DECISIONS)

Me, looking at my deadlines: Oh nevermind every submission is on the same week let me just give up on getting 2nd lower this sem there’s still 1.5 more years.

Me, with a Hedwig final at 2:30pm: LET ME BLOG

The no finals life is really insane frick especially when I had a long stretch of free time (about 2 weeks) and everything was due in Week 12 and 13. It was terrible because I do not know how to manage my time well and spent that 2 free weeks slacking and meeting up with friends instead of starting on prep for my deadlines :~)

LOL but sem 2 was fun la. I did a LOT of writing (copywriting creative writing newswriting pr writing) which I love – except copwriting zan out I had fab groupmates but the mod is not for me – and made me narrow down what I want to do in future… maybe. I am known for being flaky look at me coming in all rah-rah about Ad/PR and now I have conveniently replaced Ad with Journ.

To be honest still want to start my own magazine and publish a short novel la but how to earn money from that?? How?? #questionstothinkabout #adulting

Internship starts next week and I am excited and terrified I hope it will be fun! Googled a lot about the company and what previous interns have said about working there I’m trash HAHAHA I will be fine God gave me this internship – as opposed to for another company – for good reason :~)

Zan x

two years in university

It’s been 2 academic years since I stepped into WKW as a clueless freshie – tbh I’m still a clueless sophomore so – and I’ve honestly never felt this fulfilled in school before! It’s amazing to be in a school where people are so dedicated to their craft and really strive to submit top quality work. Granted, it gets a little demoralising when I’m not as good as them, but it’s not something worth beating myself up over. It does suck not being a straight-A or even just straight-B+ student but hovering at the lower end of the GPA totem pole has made me realise that passion really does sustain. 

My grades are terrible (I’m just going to be honest here and say it’s 3rd class so people don’t assume it’s actually a 2nd upper but vying for 1st class kind of thing) but I’ve never felt like I didn’t belong. Yes, I struggled with belonging in terms of friendship but I was happy doing projects and just bumbling along with no friends in school. I made more friends as the year went along and while they have made me more excited for breaks, nothing has been diminishing my excitement for lessons. OK, there are shitty lecturers and tutors but content creation (wow touchy term but let’s just roll with it) is really a rollercoaster that I enjoy throughly. 

Changing my never-officially-declared specialisation is a risk of sorts but I’m excited to chase God & glorify Him through studies too! 

University has taught me so much about just putting yourself out there and trying for what you want, and even if your shot misses, try again. Don’t let failure bog you down and consume you. I applied to around 10 different places for a summer internship and ultimately only got accepted for 1 – everyone else didn’t bother replying. The point is, I didn’t feel dejected and just sat around complaining about how I didn’t receive any offers. I sat around and complained but ALSO continued looking and I think that’s more important!!! 

Am going to risk my GPA even more next semester because there’s so many things I want to try but I’m rooted in the camp that says experience is more important than grades!! (OK maybe I’m just comforting myself but if I do get experience who’s the winner here hee hee)

The semester has been trying though; it pushed my limits and made me realise things about myself that I do not care to share here. I regret taking Creative Writing though because while it was fun, I don’t enjoy having to pander towards the tutor’s preferences in terms of genre. I stuck to my guns, didn’t receive good grades for two assignments thus far and am slightly bitter about it LOL. Am not perfect la I do get annoyed about bad grades. But I adamantly refuse to suck up and stifle my own creativity! (Low key judge people who take modules based on how well they can score instead of interest.. like it’s $8k a year why waste it??) 

Toodles am off to enjoy the Good Friday/Easter Sunday long weekend!

Zan x 

how I ended up

deciding to do journalism for my FYP.

I came into WKW being all anti-journalism and pro-advertising. I was so sure that it wasn’t my thing after taking Basic Media Writing (despite it being my best mod in Y1S1 ya Zan what were you thinking) and I actively pursued the advertising track, taking modules like Integrated Marketing Communications and Creative Strategies. Basically it involved a lot of campaign creation and ideas. Picked up some design skills along the way as well and did ad-hoc design for church camps too (which was good, am not complaining about the extra practice). Was anti-journalism because I really didn’t care for politics/crime/accidents I had not touched a newspaper for years. If I remember correctly, I stopped reading news by Secondary 2. The only thing I wanted to write about was myself l o l I love my blog!!

Last semester I was in church when during worship I felt this burden for journalism. To tell the stories of those who can’t. To be their voice in their times of uncertainty. To inform, to educate. I prayed really hard because I heard so many stories about Hedwig and I was terrified. Plus I look like I like to talk a lot but actually I don’t want to interview people why do I have to interview them can interview notes just fall into my lap? God is God & you can’t ignore God without feeling uneasy so in the end I decided to take Newswriting this semester.

Besides Newswriting, I’m also taking modules like Copywriting & PR Writing (OK a lot of writing going on here) so I got to experience journalism, advertising and public relations side by side and decide which one I like the most. I must say that advertising is actually at the bottom of the list – I do not like it as much as I did back in year 1! It’s really becoming a struggle for me re my copywriting module and the more I attend newswriting classes the less I find myself drawn to the world of advertising. Maybe it’s just confirmation bias or that I never really liked advertising in the first place – say what you want, but I know that God has called me to journalism for a reason (newswriting is my favourite module this semester btw LOL) and I will obey!! It is okay to not like hard news as well – I love soft news and people stories and writing my trend story is making me very very very excited :~) My dream of working in a magazine and/or being a columnist for the Straits Times has not diminished since I was a kid. I read a lot of Sunday Times back in Primary school and was really inspired by how everyone had so much to talk about their lives – probably also why I started blogging #tryingtobecool

Thank you Father for placing me in a school where my needs are met; for You know me better than I know myself. I may not know where I’m going to end up working in future, but I know He has grand plans laid in store for me should I chose to obey.

Zan x

week 8: pre-apopcalypse

I feel like a week off work made me lose touch with all organisational skills I have. My table is even messier than usual and I missed out on my readings for my lecture today. Sigh.

How do some of my coursemates have 2 day work weeks though goodness – I want that too HAHA. On the other hand if one week killed all sort of discipline I had, if I only had to be focused 2 days a week… it’s not going to end well.

photo_2017-03-06_11-11-52

We didn’t eat here but we wanted a nice background for our picture hee.

Couple of deadlines coming up and I have to make some important decisions and sort out my priorities :-( Mind is pretty much in turmoil and it’s a mess.

Zan x

27th January 2017

Typing this at work because it’s a slow day. Most people probably didn’t even bother coming to school / had the day off. Sadly my tutorial today is French & my tutor does not celebrate CNY. 

We had louhei earlier and it was very awkward because 1) we were students mixed with the full time staff & 2) I was still wearing my retainers because I didn’t have time to remove them before they called us in. Ate two mouthfuls very slowly because they kept urging us to eat and I didn’t want to eat with retainers on. 

As I grow older CNY starts to lose its significance. I mean, I still talk to my cousins but I guess I’m not as excited compared to when I was a kid. I used to be terrified of 拜年-ing to my grandparents because I didn’t know what to say to them but now that I’m older I know better. But they aren’t around anymore so it’s a moot point haha. 

** Random insert here handsome guy whom I know just walked in hahah 🌚. Been meeting people at work lately yesterday was Ze Qiang 😂

There’s a lot of schoolwork to be submitted after CNY so sadly some hustling will still be required. Really hope to finish everything by Sunday so I can enjoy on Monday!

Zan x

Life has been a mixed bag of late.

Was going to blog but I suddenly feel incredibly overwhelmed by upcoming deadlines. It’s only Week 2 and I am already slightly behind :-/ Too late to regret my module choices though now that add-drop period is over HAHA. Hopefully this (very busy) semester will help me learn to manage my time better.

Zan x

9th Jan – 13th Jan

LMAO I am too lazy to think of titles but here’s y2s2w1 in review.

9th Jan
Had my first 4AU class and it seems a little sketchy tbh. The lecturer is very passionate but I am worried that I might have to group with slackers (previously mentioned) so… OK but then again I like complaining about shitty group mates then doing everything by myself b/c I’m damn perfectionist but still it would be nice to have people pull their weight. Will see how it goes after I attend the tutorial next Tuesday haha.

Headed off to mind cafe to play some board games with Jett Ning and Zuyang (Ning’s brother) which was fun! Played Ticket to Ride, Sushi Go (I love this game btw it’s super cute and brainless) and Portrayal! I really enjoyed myself and it’s nice how we never run out of things to do together because we have so many interests in common. :’-)

10th Jan
Just one lecture today and it was Hedwig and I didn’t read the newspapers so I was really nervous. It was incredibly nerve-wracking and I wanted to die but thank goodness I managed to answer one question correctly!!! Made a mental note to start reading the newspapers at least from Sunday till Tuesday haha I will definitely have to stick to this so I don’t drown in tutorial.

11th Jan
My 2nd 4AU mod! I love it already despite the heavy workload. My professor is so bubbly and enthusiastic and experienced and I am excited to learn!! Not even kidding haha. Am considering PR for my internship but well let me think about what I want to do for FYP first – the end of this semester is my deadline to myself so I can take the appropriate modules for next semester!

Caught The Great Wall afterwards with Denz and goodness it was terrifying haha. Really good movie but terrifying why must everyone die?? Really sad haha but I liked the plot it wasn’t cliche – except the part where the whole of China needed one American to save them lmao plS.

12th Jan
Started work at One Stop! It’s quite chill and everyone has been really nice to me so far which I appreciate :~) It’s also the only reason why I go to school on Thursdays LOL out to earn money #superficialbitch I like how the other Student Assistants are also out to chill and kill some time before classes so it’s not like everyone is xiao onz or anything.

13th Jan
Had work in the morning again! It took me an hour to get to school by KJE like what is happening here it usually takes me 20 minutes at most? Goodness. I’m not taking this ever again I’d much rather take public transport and be on time for school haha. Got my period afterwards though so I skipped creative writing and went home to die :’-) Felt better after drinking ginger tea and rolling around on my bed. Then my tutee couldn’t make it so she texted me to cancel and I was like amen thank God LOL. I wanted to cancel but I lost her number after changing my phone so I couldn’t but she started it :>

Today is the day Ilyda is flying off for 5 months – farewell friend. You will be missed!

Zan x

the future

You might be expecting a serious piece on what the future has in store blah blah but I am not that kind of person so here is a list of things that I am worried about in the near and far future!!!!

  • will I be able to cope with my school workload + tuition + part time job? realised the workload really quite no joke – very stoked to push myself but at the same time worried that not only will I fall short of the professor’s standards but also my own.
  • what am I going to do for fyp? I’m definitely going for either campaign or feature writing but am still unsure!! Pretty much set my heart on doing a pr internship though (but with my track record I probably won’t get it de zzz I never get anything I want when it comes to applying for things sob) (but OK I have faith that I will still grow wherever God places me like the other modules I have this semester hee)
  • groupmates for fyp 😪 self-explanatory I believe.
  • ok my JOB. Very important ya my 饭碗 – how am I going to repay student loans, save up for all the adulting expenses et cetera.
  • speaking of savings mine are dangerously low and 2017 is the year I turn it all around!!! Set a savings goal and a budget sheet for every month and hopefully I will achieve that target.

Sigh. Typing this out has made me feel better though. It’s only day two of sem two haha goodness.

Zan x

sem two day one

Happy face post-4029! Am still on the fence about this module because it seems incredibly intense 😯 It’s like Creative Strategies but with twice the workload and I’m not sure that is even achievable haha. Yet it’s really handson and practical which I love so… There’s tons of exchange students as well and I don’t really want to group with them because I’m afraid they won’t pull their weight when it comes to group work and I hate slackers!!!!

Zuyang forgot to focus before taking the picture HAHA. Went to mind cafe after school to meet them for some board game fun!! Do not regret, absolutely love. Can’t wait to meet them again tomorrow though that’s for sending zuning off – farewell friend!!! We’ll meet again real soon.

Hedwig lecture tomorrow and actually I’m quite excited leh haha. Doing a LOT of writing mods this semester – copywriting, newswriting, pr writing, creative writing. My writing skills aren’t exactly up to scratch it’s all interest 😭😭 Especiall creative writing….. quite worried I won’t be able to get a B+ haha.

Zan x